


Zombies

by iloveitblue



Series: Prompts [156]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, meet cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-05
Updated: 2015-01-05
Packaged: 2018-03-05 13:45:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3122387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iloveitblue/pseuds/iloveitblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where there is a zombie infestation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Zombies

Clint woke up with a start because of a high pitched scream.

For a moment he felt disoriented and wondered where he was before realizing that oh yes, he crashed at Natasha’s room after a heavy night of drinking to the end of the semester. He vaguely remembers Natasha kissing his head good night and/or good morning before going out the door. 

He glanced at his phone - while trying not get blinded by the glare - to confirm that its a little past 1830H. Assuming he didn’t sleep for more than 24 hours, it was a safe bet that Natasha went out during the morning then.

Clint groaned and tried to roll over and burrow himself deeper into the couch to try and forget his hangover when he heard another groan. A groan that wasn’t his. He frowned and got up to look out the window of Natasha’s apartment.

That’s when he saw it.

A mass of flesh eating zombies roaming the streets. Bloody and clothes tattered. Some even carried their own guts. People of all shapes and sizes, creeds and profession, walked the streets of Manhattan with a blank look on their faces, blood covered their clothes, limp messed with their walk, groaning like there was no tomorrow - there probably wasn’t if Clint was the only one who didn’t get infected/bit/turned into a zombie because he was sleeping. 

With his hangover being the least of his problems, he had to do something. He couldn’t just hide out in Natasha’s- oh shit. Natasha. Was she okay? He dove for his phone, still sitting on the coffee table and dialed Natasha’s number.

It rang three times before the voice mail picked it up:  _If this is Clint, I’m over at Bucky’s place in Brooklyn. Take out the trash and clean up your puke before you leave. If it’s not then you know what to do. -beep-_ _  
_

Clint stared at his phone with horror. Trash was the fucking least of his problems. There’s a zombie infestation in the streets and he has to get somewhere safe.

At least Natasha was in Brooklyn with Bucky. They could at least watch each other’s backs if the infestation already spread. 

That still left Clint with no one but himself. This was an all or nothing game. Not even a game because this was reality. He had to survive long enough, avoid getting infected long enough, possibly kill zombies long enough for him to get to safety. Although with so many variables unknown, he doesn’t know where safety actually was. 

He looked around Natasha’s apartment and started scouring for essentials. Food, would be weapons, water, a swiss knife,  _toilet paper_. He had to at least get to Brooklyn first. Rendezvous with Tasha and Bucky if they’re both still human. 

The only weapon he found in the apartment though was a golf club - since when did Natasha play golf and where the hell did she stash her knife collection? Even her kitchen knives were nowhere to be seen.

He put everything in a backpack, packing only essentials good for a day or three until he finds some place he can scavenge for more. He needed his cargo to be light if he wants to get out undetected and fast. 

He held tightly on to the golf club, and opened the door only to be faced by his first zombie, staring at him curiously. He yelled something that would be considered a battle cry if Thor had anything to say about it and swung the golf club at the zombie like a sword. 

Unexpectedly the zombie ducked and weaved through every single one of Clint’s attacks.

"Wait. Stop!! What are you doing?!" The zombie yelled out even as he tried to avoid getting hit by the club and his hands raised in surrender. "Stop!"

Clint stopped mid-swing - both he and the zombie short of breath. “Zombies talk?” Clint can’t help but ask.

"What are you talking about? And why are you swinging at me like a madman?" 

"Wha- I- You’re the fucking zombie here! You explain to me why you’re not trying to eat my brain!"

"It’s make-up!" The zombie shot back, rubbing the blood off of the corner of his eyes to show it to Clint. "See? I’m not a zombie." He declared.

"You think that’ll be enough to get you through the horde of zombies out there? What’s your plan? Fake it ‘til you make it?"

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Outside. There’s a horde of zombies. It’s the fucking apocalypse. Do you want me to paint you a picture?" Sometimes Clint was amazed at people’s ability at denial.

"Of course there’s a horde of zombies outside!" The not-zombie declared with an exasperated sigh. "That’s kind of the whole point of a zombie crawl!"

It took Clint a second to realize his mistake and his hangover returned with a vengeance. Clint groaned, sliding down the wall. “Oh my god. Fucking hell. I thought- well, you know what I thought.” He buried his head in his hands and groaned some more. He looked up and the not-zombie was still staring at him. “Look, I’m so sorry. I didn’t- I wasn’t thinking right and my hangover made me overreact. I’m sorry I swung at you multiple times with- with this.” He threw the golf club sideways with disgust. 

"Well, you look shitty enough to pass for a zombie at least." The guy said after a while.

Clint huffed “Feel it too. Don’t worry.”

The guy smirked at Clint. “You’ll need blood on you if you want to join the crawl though. I’ve got some left over back at my place. Come on.” The guy outstretched his hand and Clint took it to help him stand. “I’m Phil by the way.”

Clint smiled at him, still not letting go of Phil’s hand. “Clint.”

**Author's Note:**

> [Here on tumblr](http://promptmephlint.tumblr.com/post/107221232746/i-regret-not-sleeping-last-night-now-im)


End file.
